Bacon-wrapped Orange Chicken

I like to exaggerate a lot, but when I say that last night was one of the worst eating experiences of my life I am being honest. The idea of a wing eating contest seemed good. However, in my head I had imagined delicious wings from Uncle Sam's. Straight chicken, natural amounts of skin, and delicately sauced. This is why I predicted that I would make it to the mid-20s. It was at about wing #2 that I said to myself: "Hey! These wings are disgusting and I wouldn't eat them if you paid me." But since my pride was on the line, I kept my mouth stuffed with chicken, excess skin and cartilage, and sauce, so much sauce. I didn't express my true feelings until Cody realized that in fact, these wings tasted like bacon. What is my favorite breakfast meat? Sausage. Everybody knows that.

I was happy that Linx entered as an illegal/"rogue" competitor. Her body has the ability to sustain a lot more grease and cartilage than my own. She was Cody's true rival in this game. However, if she wouldn't have been there, I could have respectfully withdrawn much sooner and saved myself a lot of pain.

Last night was bad. I was like a snake that had just eaten a large animal and you could see it just sitting there waiting to be digested. No position was comfortable. Linx and I tossed and turned in between drinking as much water as possible. The salt intake was horrendous. It's 10:24 am. I have no intention of eating any food today, I feel no hunger. I am SO THIRSTY and my mouth feels like when you eat too much pineapple-I know this feeling all too well.

Worth it? Yes. I got to wear a bib. So many outrageous things were said and done. And so many good friends were there. I love them. And most importantly, I have a legitimate reason to never eat at Winger's again.