Ed Hardy: "So I requested a transcript a while ago and it was never sent."
Desk guy: "I'm sorry, what's your name? I'll look up the status of it."
EH: "Ed Hardy."
DG: "I have see no information about this. When did you request it?"
EH: "About a year ago."
(WHAT!? This is when I started freaking out. Are you kidding me? You asked for a transcript one YEAR ago and now you are just checking up on things? I mean normally ordering a transcript signals some sort of new school or something important. It just didn't show up so you put your life on hold for A YEAR?!)
Desk Guy: "Oh. Well, yeah, we don't keep information for that long. I'll just have to have you fill out a new one."
EH: "Do you have the address for UVU on hand?"
And that's when it all made sense...