"You will find a bushel of money."

I'll have you know that my Google translator is automatically set to translate from Chinese to English. I think you know why. Here's what they have to say:

"Ado, I wish you liking"

"Necessity is the mother of invention"

"Such a good blog, see later how to do ah"

"you always know the right thing to say!"-I especially love this one

"Death is sad, but even more sad to live unhappy"

I continue to play around with the idea of making my blog private, but who doesn't want their own personal fortune cookie writers?

It's so shameful

It's been a long time since I've written and I'm sure you're all dying for a funny story. I happen to have one.

Recently Sac related to me her side of a series of fiascoes in our apartment. From her room she could easily hear the conversations in the bathroom that I shared with Linx. One day while sitting in her room she hears something along these lines:
Me: "Why is my toothbrush wet?".
Linx: "That's my toothbrush."
Me: "No it's not."
Linx: "Yes it is."
Me: "NO IT'S NOT!"
Linx: "Sorry!"

A few weeks later:
Me: "Linx, why do you always put my loofah on the ground?!"
Linx: "That's my loofah."
Me: "No, it's mine."
Linx: "I KNOW that that is my loofah."
Me: "NO IT'S NOT!"
Linx: "Sorry!"

Then about a month ago I go to brush my teeth and AGAIN find it moist and CLEARLY recently used. I text Linx "I hate you". I similar conversation as those above occurs. That night Liz gives me a new toothbrush and I move anything related to my teeth into Liz's bathroom.

Things were going smoothly until last night. I'm brushing my teeth and as I spit my eye catches the toothbrush holder. What's this?! My toothbrush is in there. This can only mean one thing. I HAVE USED LIZ'S TOOTHBRUSH! She's in the loft. I crawl up the stairs. Defeated. Lift the toothbrush in surrender and tell her the news. The irony is too much to handle.

However, while Linx is still using my toothbrush, I boiled Liz's and returned it to it's home.

Mewsicle

Well. It's two days after my birthday and I'm sitting in the flaming hot loft surrounded by a combination of facial hair, cake, and sad balloons. It was a great party--thank you Liz, Rachel, Marci, Linx, Dede, and Cory and whoever else I forgot! Ridiculous and funny. Once I get my hands on some more pictures I'll post them, but this little gem captures the night pretty well. This was taken just moments after Cody sneak attacked me from behind and smashed a chocolate cupcake in my mouth. What would I do without him? The combination of sweat from dancing and the frosting really did a number on my hair that night.

Normally birthdays are no big deal, but for some reason 22 made me feel weird. Maybe it was just a general lack of sleep. Maybe it's because I should be a grown up now and I'm still a kid. OR Maybe it's because all I ate was 3 cinnamon rolls and in 'n out that day. Whatever it is, I feel weird.

Things I googled today:
1. Curds and whey. It is in fact just cottage cheese. I had NO idea.
2. The Jingle Cats. One of the original members of the band was named BINKY! Coincidence? I think not.

Them Chickens Jackin' My Style

I realized something the other day. Liz referred to something that she found out on Facebook, and I obviously had completely missed it. Why is this? I don't care about other people. On Facebook that is. I only pay attention to emails that are sent to me informing me of messages written to ME, pictures posted of ME, and comments made on MY wall. Exhibit A. Yesterday, while avoiding homework, I found myself looking at my own pictures for the eightieth time. And this got me to thinking. What are you doing? You know yourself and what you've done. I have come to the conclusion that I am in fact not that selfish, but I absolutely love looking back on my life and laughing every time I do. Well as I was doing so yesterday, I came across some pictures that reminded me of a post I've been meaning to do. There are certain scenarios, positions, etc. that seem to repeat themselves in my life. Here are a few examples:

Sac and I have spent our college experience living together, except when we were both in different countries. Our freshman year we discovered that we were beginning to morph into each other. The first time this happened we realized, in class, that although we got ready separately and walked to campus separately, we were in fact wearing the same thing.


In later years it became apparent that even the clothes under our clothes were the same...This year I walked into SAC's room and she was absolutely SHOCKED. I had no idea why...
(Come back to me Sac!)
This next instance just kills me. First, my nieces chase a goose at a park over Thanksgiving weekend.
Second, Linx chases a bird in a park in Brisbane, Australia. (she's 16 years older than Corinne and 19 years older than Milly)
This may be my favorite. First, Liz finally finding a place to pay it forward after some woman in Australia gave her back one more dollar than she was supposed to.
Cory. After winning a contest at the Halloween dance and getting two free movie tickets. Note: the girl he won them for didn't want anything to do with a banana.
Last but not least. Linx, triumphant after catching a shrimp in her mouth.

AZN

I've had weird feelings about Asians since high school. Well maybe before that, but this is the earliest I can remember. I went to a good school and they flocked to it. Or maybe it became a good school because they flocked to it. Chicken or egg? Not sure. Anyways, they are smart. Fact. And I had to try to keep up with them for many years. It was a competitive relationship. We talked and laughed with each other, but underneath it all we wished the other would just back off so we could keep our spot in the top 5%. Frenemies.

I thought it was over once I left high school and began attending the Whitest University in the U.S. But alas, they have followed me. Thank you Asians for reading and commenting on my blog. I have no idea who you are, and most of the time I don't know what you're saying, but it's about time you were acknowledged. Someday I'd like to know who you all are and why/how you find my blog interesting. Am I in fact famous in China!? Don't tell me yet. Let's keep the secret alive because really, I'm probably being used in some SEO scheme.

If it's true, I've known it for a long time. If not, I never knew it.

I was about to write another blog about some "research" I did, like unto the Top Ramen, but then realized that I'm really bad about posting about real activities. So, to keep you all from thinking that I do nothing, let's do a little recap on our Vegas trip this semester. We decided we deserved a little getaway for 3 reasons: 1. We had all almost died at the Flower Patch for Valenine's Day. 2. I had just finished that outrageous sculpture class of mine. 3. It was Linx's Birthday week!!! I'm going to tell this story with mostly pictures, more exciting that way.Rachel's fantastic friends let us stay at their house in St. George on the way there and back. This is like the only picture I have of their house, but hello, check out that screen. They spoiled us so much, and we loved it.The first night we were there we decided to go out for sushi, Linx's request. Sushi has long been at the top of my list for foods I wish I liked. Well, BAM, that night I fell in love. It was SO GOOD!I started reading while I was waiting for everyone to get ready, and Liz found me in this position. It just happened.I was frequently making everyone walk through all of the hotels. That night we explored the Bellagio and came across this little Asian garden, Chinese New Year perhaps? We also happened upon Lindsay's husband Brandon in this garden....what are the odds?I love me some blown glass.I can never get enough of these fountains. I believe this was the first time we watched the show.
Linx and I were big gamblers. We both lost a dollar in these penny slots. They were highly advanced and I had no idea what I was doing. I also got totally jipped and got a slot where you couldn't even pull the handle. This picture isn't even good, but the crazy man that took it kept saying. "Oh anytime. Anytime you want a picture I'll take it." As if we would just see him around again.The next day involved A LOT of walking and more shopping, eating, and exploring. Oh and the crazy rides on top of the Stratosphere. I don't have the pictures of that, but watching Liz and Rachel cry was worth every minute!!

Finding the Precious Slut 4 was an unexpected tender mercy.I never felt uncomfortable on the strip, but hanging out on Fremont Street was almost too much for me. That's where all of the hicks hang out. Good thing it had ridiculous deep-fried items to redeem itself.

Well to wrap it up. I almost killed everyone on our drive back to St. George because it was raining and I don't know how to drive cars that don't have automatic lights. But everything worked out fine. We had a wonderful and absolutely hilarious time. And yes, I love Vegas, to the dismay of my mother.

We're both sitting here with the cursor in the title...

Liz just asked me what to title her blog, not knowing that I was also pondering the same question. Perfect that she inspired the title, because she in fact inspired this post.

Ever since I have known Liz she has put in minimum effort for maximum results in school. Oftentimes I have wondered if my brain is in fact as awesome as hers, but I've always been too scared to test it out. For my entire schooling career I've worked pretty hard in every class. Then comes last semester, and I realize that I can't get everything done, so I've got to slack off in at least one class. I had to take Family Finance, my last required class to finish my HFL degree. I was very bitter about this, having already taken a personal finance class. To add to my bitterness, I absolutely disliked the teacher. The first day of class produced nonstop laughs from over 100 of my classmates while Cory and I sat in awe, trying to figure out why they thought it was funny. Cory dropped the class, realizing that he already knew how to stay out of debt(by selling his electronics) and I was left to suffer alone. I was pretty stable for the first several weeks and then I got 100% on the first test. That's when it hit me. I'm going to be Liz in Family Finance. My attendance dropped to about 30%. I barely studied for the second test and got an 80%. Pulled out a 96% on the final. And a A in the class. Family Finance Liz-style was relaxed, easy, and a little dangerous. I loved every minute of it.

Thank you Liz for being an inspiration in my life. She is now helping me get back to high school Emily, by training me to sleep through her 6 daily snoozes. You're the best!